I'm stronger.
I'm wiser.
I'm better.
Because of you.
I never could have made it.
With out You.
{Marvin Sapp}
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
primer. continued...
I'd love to be the paint...
but... will wait until I'm the right paint on the right primer.
the best primer.
a wall can be primed and painted countless times
the amount doesn't matter
it should just be the best combination
it can take time to find the best color
but you KNOW when you've found it
I am being primed now
for a lasting paint.
He is priming me.
I pray that he is being primed too.
but... will wait until I'm the right paint on the right primer.
the best primer.
a wall can be primed and painted countless times
the amount doesn't matter
it should just be the best combination
it can take time to find the best color
but you KNOW when you've found it
I am being primed now
for a lasting paint.
He is priming me.
I pray that he is being primed too.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
primer.
When painting anything, it is good to prime it first.
To make the surface ready to receive the paint.
The paint will last longer with primer under it.
The paint appears more vibrant & colorful when previously primed.
I'm tired of being the primer.
I desire to be the paint.
To make the surface ready to receive the paint.
The paint will last longer with primer under it.
The paint appears more vibrant & colorful when previously primed.
I'm tired of being the primer.
I desire to be the paint.
Saturday, August 27, 2011
New Pair of Shoes
after I was hospitalized last year and my life was changed
my shoe shopping had to change also.
I could no longer wear heals.
I LIVED in heals.
I ran in heals.
Wearing heals made me feel important and HOT.
Wearing heals could change a whole outfit and my mood.
That was taken away from me... because of the illness.
they caused migraines.
So OF COURSE I would choose health over "looking good" and wearing something that kind of "defined me"
One of my nick names was "Suzy Shoes" because all I wore was heals.
I share this - because it was a HARD CHANGE.
I still crave wearing my heals.
I think of what my outfit would look like in heals.
I'm SHORT... so I think of the height that I would have in them.
But I don't get to choose if I wear them now.
Actually I do. I am choosing health and wellness
not my appearance.
It has taken me a while - but I like my new pair of shoes.
I am beginning to like flats. It's a good thing they're in style now!
It was hard to get used to flats.
It is not what I wanted.
I fought it and seriously {sadly} cried about it a little bit
{that's how I handle things tears just come}
But now... I'm ok
Change is hard. Especially when it's not what you want.
But I choose health and pursuing what is best
over what I want.
Maybe someday I'll be able to wear heals again -
they just won't have the same place in my life.
I'll wear them in a healthy way.
Not all the time... and they won't define me.
Change isn't a horrible thing.
It just takes some time to break in the new shoes.
{I think I will always prefer Heals... if I had a choice}
my shoe shopping had to change also.
I could no longer wear heals.
I LIVED in heals.
I ran in heals.
Wearing heals made me feel important and HOT.
Wearing heals could change a whole outfit and my mood.
That was taken away from me... because of the illness.
they caused migraines.
So OF COURSE I would choose health over "looking good" and wearing something that kind of "defined me"
One of my nick names was "Suzy Shoes" because all I wore was heals.
I share this - because it was a HARD CHANGE.
I still crave wearing my heals.
I think of what my outfit would look like in heals.
I'm SHORT... so I think of the height that I would have in them.
But I don't get to choose if I wear them now.
Actually I do. I am choosing health and wellness
not my appearance.
It has taken me a while - but I like my new pair of shoes.
I am beginning to like flats. It's a good thing they're in style now!
It was hard to get used to flats.
It is not what I wanted.
I fought it and seriously {sadly} cried about it a little bit
{that's how I handle things tears just come}
But now... I'm ok
Change is hard. Especially when it's not what you want.
But I choose health and pursuing what is best
over what I want.
Maybe someday I'll be able to wear heals again -
they just won't have the same place in my life.
I'll wear them in a healthy way.
Not all the time... and they won't define me.
Change isn't a horrible thing.
It just takes some time to break in the new shoes.
Friday, August 26, 2011
how small is a mustard seed?
this morning I got a message to pray for my friends dad.
he has been in the hospital for almost 4 months.
there is an ethics comity that are trying to get them to pull the plug and were meeting at 12:00pm
My first thought was, "I can't pray right now - I don't know if I have the faith that is needed for him. I'm tried and worn out... how can I PRAY?"
then I was reminded - "Faith as small as a mustard seed moves mountains"
"I have at least that much faith. I know I do!!"
I got off of work at Noon so instead of just driving home and praying for him. I decided to call my friend - so that she could HEAR my prayers.
It was amazing how my faith multiplied as we prayed together. It weld up inside of me like a fire. There was authority in the prayer. There was a belief and excitement - knowing that God IS TRUE TO HIS WORD. That He works ALL THINGS together for our good and His glory.
The news that came back from the ethics meeting was great! He sat up in the bed and shook his head to the question - do you want the ventilator taken out... that would mean you will no longer live...
he is in a lot of pain. but has said that he doesn't want to be on pain meds because they are addicting ... he only wants Tylenol. He is an amazing fighter. Fighting for His life.
I remember being in a hospital bed. Not fully knowing what was going on. But I could feel peoples' prayers, love and support. Knowing that the people that I love were fighting for me when I couldn't fight made all of the difference in the world!
I am here today I believe because of them. It was not my time to go. And we all are believing that it is NOT my friend's dad's time to go!! We'll fight for him - when he can't fight. And when he can we'll support and love him!!
Sending prayers. With faith bigger than I mustard seed.
he has been in the hospital for almost 4 months.
there is an ethics comity that are trying to get them to pull the plug and were meeting at 12:00pm
My first thought was, "I can't pray right now - I don't know if I have the faith that is needed for him. I'm tried and worn out... how can I PRAY?"
then I was reminded - "Faith as small as a mustard seed moves mountains"
"I have at least that much faith. I know I do!!"
I got off of work at Noon so instead of just driving home and praying for him. I decided to call my friend - so that she could HEAR my prayers.
It was amazing how my faith multiplied as we prayed together. It weld up inside of me like a fire. There was authority in the prayer. There was a belief and excitement - knowing that God IS TRUE TO HIS WORD. That He works ALL THINGS together for our good and His glory.
The news that came back from the ethics meeting was great! He sat up in the bed and shook his head to the question - do you want the ventilator taken out... that would mean you will no longer live...
he is in a lot of pain. but has said that he doesn't want to be on pain meds because they are addicting ... he only wants Tylenol. He is an amazing fighter. Fighting for His life.
I remember being in a hospital bed. Not fully knowing what was going on. But I could feel peoples' prayers, love and support. Knowing that the people that I love were fighting for me when I couldn't fight made all of the difference in the world!
I am here today I believe because of them. It was not my time to go. And we all are believing that it is NOT my friend's dad's time to go!! We'll fight for him - when he can't fight. And when he can we'll support and love him!!
Sending prayers. With faith bigger than I mustard seed.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
becoming.
a perfect reflection of His love.
this is not something that I can DO.
or ACHIEVE.
on my own.
it is something I am becoming.
I CAN become this in Him.
it's not the pursuit of perfection. It's becoming a reflection of His perfect Love.
in this I'm becoming a perfect reflection of His love.
this is not something that I can DO.
or ACHIEVE.
on my own.
it is something I am becoming.
I CAN become this in Him.
it's not the pursuit of perfection. It's becoming a reflection of His perfect Love.
in this I'm becoming a perfect reflection of His love.
Monday, August 22, 2011
a scraped knee
at work this morning there was this little boy who tripped on this little girl's puzzle she had been working on all morning. He was so apologetic to her for tripping on it... then noticed as he got up from the ground that he had scraped his knee.
Tears began to roll down his face. He went over to a couch and began to cry.
As I went to help him he said, "No no no... don't look. I'm ok."
I had to see if he really was ok - or if he needed a band aid. But he was so insistent that I not look at his scraped knee that I knew if I insisted that it would make the situation worse. So I asked him if he would like a hug. He looked up and said "Yes" and then just snuggled in my arms for a bit.
The tears were now streaming down his face. My eyes started welling up with tears for him. I wiped his tears and gave him a few more hugs and said, "It's ok... I'll just look at your knee - I need to see if I can help" but he had the same reply.
He was embarrassed that he was hurt - and he didn't want anyone to worry about it. It wasn't a big deal... but it was... his heart was a bit broken over it.
I asked him if he wanted to sit on the couch for a while and he said yes... and cuddled into the couch by himself.
Another little girl saw what was happening and as I walked away she walked up to him and said, "look... it's ok - I have owies too!" This broke my heart. She could see where he was at and wanted to help. She could relate to him and let him know it was going to be ok. She said to him, "Look... I have owies on my leg too..." and began to show him the 5 that she had on her leg {some were mosquito bites...} but they helped make him comfortable with his own scrape. She reaffirmed him... "It's ok to have owies... they will get better."
She helped him open up and not be afraid to show his pain.
This little boy has one of the most sensitive and precious hearts! So innocent and loving!
I think as adults there are times {probably a majority of the time} that we don't want to show our pain. We can say, "No no no. I'm ok... I don't want you to have to deal with this. I can handle it on my own."
BUT - if we would learn from these little kids - who don't always know how to communicate - but most of the time they communicate better than we do... it's better to let someone in, hold us and cry with us and help us get through painful times in our lives. We CAN let people see our scratches or bumps, mosquito bites... or deep scars. We don't have to hide the imperfections in our lives. Whatever it is - we can let people see it and help us heal.
I learned a lot today from that little boy and little girl - and his scraped knee.
Tears began to roll down his face. He went over to a couch and began to cry.
As I went to help him he said, "No no no... don't look. I'm ok."
I had to see if he really was ok - or if he needed a band aid. But he was so insistent that I not look at his scraped knee that I knew if I insisted that it would make the situation worse. So I asked him if he would like a hug. He looked up and said "Yes" and then just snuggled in my arms for a bit.
The tears were now streaming down his face. My eyes started welling up with tears for him. I wiped his tears and gave him a few more hugs and said, "It's ok... I'll just look at your knee - I need to see if I can help" but he had the same reply.
He was embarrassed that he was hurt - and he didn't want anyone to worry about it. It wasn't a big deal... but it was... his heart was a bit broken over it.
I asked him if he wanted to sit on the couch for a while and he said yes... and cuddled into the couch by himself.
Another little girl saw what was happening and as I walked away she walked up to him and said, "look... it's ok - I have owies too!" This broke my heart. She could see where he was at and wanted to help. She could relate to him and let him know it was going to be ok. She said to him, "Look... I have owies on my leg too..." and began to show him the 5 that she had on her leg {some were mosquito bites...} but they helped make him comfortable with his own scrape. She reaffirmed him... "It's ok to have owies... they will get better."
She helped him open up and not be afraid to show his pain.
This little boy has one of the most sensitive and precious hearts! So innocent and loving!
I think as adults there are times {probably a majority of the time} that we don't want to show our pain. We can say, "No no no. I'm ok... I don't want you to have to deal with this. I can handle it on my own."
BUT - if we would learn from these little kids - who don't always know how to communicate - but most of the time they communicate better than we do... it's better to let someone in, hold us and cry with us and help us get through painful times in our lives. We CAN let people see our scratches or bumps, mosquito bites... or deep scars. We don't have to hide the imperfections in our lives. Whatever it is - we can let people see it and help us heal.
I learned a lot today from that little boy and little girl - and his scraped knee.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)